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Finding what works with a 'one size fits all' mentality


Living in a world where we've become accustomed to the expression 'one size fits all' in my humble opinion is a fallacy. Going into a clothing store we can find in the women's section a collection of clothing marked under the header of "one size fits all". Why? My assumption is there's still an unsettling need for 'titles'.

Living in a society where information is flying at us nonstop, and from various angles we can instantly go into overload and overwhelm. Once we move past the overload and overwhelm we seem to quickly move into apathy, which is a dangerous place to end up. Why? Because we become inmobilized and unmotivated to do anything. We become frozen in time, yet time takes no heed to this standstill and continues forging ahead.

The longer we remain in this imobilized state of being, the more challenging it is to break this mental state, thus causing our relationships to breakdown, our health to suffer, possible career loss or business failure, and a disassociation with self.

Although even in this apathetic state the Universe still attempts to gently shake us, grab our attention, and direct us to help. During these precious moments is when we decide we need some assistance with our life and begin looking for answers or looking for something or someone to help us get out of our apathetic state.

Perhaps we've heard others talk about hiring a coach or mentor to help them with certain things they had going on in their lives and it was very helpful for them. So, begins the search for a coach or mentor. Once again, you find yourself baffled over the number of coaches or mentors out there who essentially coin the same promise, "to help solve your problem". They are essentially falling under that category of 'one size fits all'. They are typically promising, guarantying, or professing the same thing, "problem solving solutions". So how does one choose?

One of the best ways to choose a coach or mentor is understanding what you need. Do you need a coach to help you with health/fitness? Do you need a coach to help you with relationship issues? Do you need a coach to help you with money? Do you need a coach to help you with your mindset, tackling that inner-critic inside your head causing you to struggle? It's pretty safe to say there's a coach or mentor out there for anything; it's a matter of you sifting through to find the right one for you. (Note: Coaching and mentoring use the same skills and approach but coaching is short term task-based and mentoring is a longer term relationship.)

Another deciding factor is getting to know that coach. Don't be afraid to ask them some very direct questions in order to make the best decisions for you. Make sure you do your research as well. Don't be afraid to ask for testimonies/referrals. Sometimes the very best resources we have are through friends or families who have previously hired a coach or mentor. Again, don't be afraid to ask.

In both my personal and professional life I have hired a coach, and they were not the same coach. What I needed in my personal life was vastly different than my professional life, which required different coaches. Do not feel obligated to stay with the 'one size fits all' mentality as it may not be to your benefit.

Being a professional coach, when I'm in need of hiring a coach I'm looking for someone who is continuing to grow and expand themself. I want to know my coach is continuing to education themself; has a passion for gaining more experience to share with their clients; and has a true desire to help others. I also want to know they are relatable. Someone whose personality and coaching style meshes well with mine.

Understand a coach or mentor will only be as good as the client who is willing to be coached or mentored. It's a collaborative process. Just like going to a medical doctor, an auto mechanic, a massage therapist, or any other service provider, they are only as proficient as they can be with the information they are given. The more you are willing and open to work on yourself, the more your coach or mentor will be able to elevate you onto the next steps of your goals.

Remember YOU achieve the success, your coach provides you the tools and support to achieve it.

Don't let the 'one size fits all' mentality keep you from deciding what works best for you. That perfect fit is out there; you just have to seek it. I think the ancient Zen proverb says it best, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear."

Until next time, so much love.

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