Imagine a level of honesty you may have not had the pleasure of tapping into yet.
We teach our children the importance of being honest.
We hold a certain belief or value around honesty.
We expect our partners to be honest with us.
There's even moments throughout out our "growth" spurts where we decide it's time to "get real" with ourselves about one thing or another.
Here's some examples:
I know I'm a "jerk" magnet.
I know I don't eat well or exercise regularly, and it's why I'm unhealthy.
I know when I get really stressed, I drink, eat, smoke too much.
Certainly taking accountability for one's actions requires honesty, and changed behavior helps support that honesty.
What if we took this honesty to a level perhaps never delved before.
There's something ridiculously scary, rewarding and unbelievably freeing when one can go to the depths of something, and free the chain that binds them.
Imagine you work hard everyday, you make a living that provides for you, and acknowledge for the most part you're pretty happy with it all.
On the other hand, you have this desire......this pang.......this gnawing deep within you that says, "I really want to make more money."
When you ponder on that desire--really let it resonate with you----your inner critic will surface and remind you all the reasons why that's not possible.
What if you were to push past this rascally nay-saying twit, and searched a little deeper.
Knowing your inner critic is being protective of something---what could it be?
What if in this digging process you discovered you really didn't want to put up the effort and sacrifice that it would take to make more money?
Could that be a game changer for you?
You see, it's one thing to scratch the surface of your inner critic's "triggering" or "no-way-jose" response to your inquiries of your personal growth, and it's a whole other archaeological discovery when you get completely and fully honest with yourself.
It seems from a very early onset we've learned through repetition to hide from our honesty because we think we won't get caught or in trouble.
For example, when you're a little kid and you sneak a cookie from the cookie jar, and your mom asked, "did you eat a cookie?" More often then not your first response is "no".
Here's another example, and this has to do with a 3 month old baby.
My friend's precious grandson is only 3 months old, and that little beauty is already trying to turn over.
The other day while he was lying on his tummy, doing what he could to turn himself over, his parents stood by videoing this fantastic moment.
They were excited to see what he was going to do.
He gets himself finally turned over, and BAM he sees his parents standing there, and his eyes opened wide.....like, "oh crap, you saw that".
Now, of course, that's purely an assumption of what he thought, and interestingly enough it's how things get labeled, practiced, and behavioralized in our everyday living.
For years I labeled men as clowns because I felt that was better then saying "jerks" or "assholes".
I seemed to attracted every clown on the planet.
It never dawned on me I was the ring master of Clown town.
When I started getting honest with myself, I would say things like.....
I know I put off this vibe.
I'm too nice of a person.
I see who they are deep down inside, in spite of their behavior.
When I decided to get REAL honest with myself, I had to dig deeper.
I had to go to a level I wasn't sure if I'd make it back unscathed or not.
I had to go to a level that was so dark, it scared me.
I had to go to such a level that required me to be accountable, responsible, and forgivable.
I wasn't sure if I had enough oxygen for such a dive.
There was a few things I knew for certain though;
➡️the existing pain was too much to continue carrying
➡️I didn't want to keep attracting clowns
➡️I didn't want to do this alone
What I knew about myself was I was strong. I had evidence of my strength through life's experiences I'd lived through.
What I also knew was I didn't have the experience to dive this deep safely on my own.
Asking for help had been one of those shitty lies my inner critic told me was not safe-----which resulted in a lot of isolated struggle and pain.
I decided to work with someone who had the experience to go on this dive----this deeper than anything I had ever experienced before dive.
That decision alone, I realized later, was the first step towards diving deeper into honesty.
If you're considering diving deeper, may I suggest doing it with someone who has experience.
If you're ready to dive deeper, get in touch with me, and we'll get started.